I went on a long run thinking I had plenty of nature time to find my word. After six hours I had forgotten my quest and the only words coming to mind were “slow,” I’m hungry,” and “you’re almost there.” I was in the negative loop, focusing on how far I was from my intended goal and how much I wanted to stop. Realizing that kind of negative talk was not going to make the last few miles any better, I focused on the warm air on my skin after last week’s cold and snowy jaunt. I thought about the amazing ability of my body to even get out here and slowly, hangrily run 20-plus miles. That little shift worked and instead of lamenting my slow pace, I took advantage and looked around at the tiny shoots of green starting to pop through the brown grass.
I thought that would reveal my word. But not even gratitude felt right for what was going on in the bigger picture of my life. I plodded along, finished my run, ate some food, massaged my sore muscles, and relaxed into the afternoon.
I forgot about my word quest and got lost in the looming to-do list and lack of progress on said list. The year had started slowly for me. I hadn’t been able to get as much traction or do as much as I thought I would have done by now. Sitting in the chair looking out through the ponderosa pines I let out a big sigh. Somewhere between the trees my word appeared.
Grace.
It just sounds soothing. And definitely what I needed to hear. I don’t even know where it really came from. I didn’t read it somewhere or even consciously think about my critical attitude. But wherever it came from, I know it was meant for me.
